Editor’s note: A former Totus Tuus missionary, Jenny Hill is discerning a religious vocation with the Nashville Dominicans.
“I continue my pursuit toward the goal, the prize of God’s upward calling, in Christ Jesus.”
–Philippians 3:14
My name is Jenny Hill. I grew up in the Diocese of Superior, and though much of my adult life has taken me elsewhere, what I bring back is not a finished story but an honest one. For much of my life, the goal has been focused on being “the best” at whatever I put my mind to. First, I strived to be the best athlete. Then when injuries got in my way, I focused on being the best student. When my academic journey came to a close, I focused on being the best missionary, friend, daughter — the list goes on. I wanted to be “the best” because the prize of recognition and the feeling of accomplishment were what motivated me to pursue the goals in the first place. Within the last four to five years, I have truly begun to realize that the only prize worth pursuing is the Lord’s heart.
In the summer of 2022, I moved out to Washington state to serve as a missionary with Our Lady Star of the Sea Missionary Internship. During that year of radically giving my life in complete service to others, the seeds of surrender and trust begin to take root in my life. In the years that followed, the Lord offered opportunities for those seeds to grow as he led me deeper into the secret places of my heart — the fears I had been carrying quietly, and lies I had believed about who I was and what I was worth.
Gently and faithfully, He guided me in cutting those down, one step of surrender at a time. With each step of trust, slowly I found myself drawn further: speaking with religious sisters about their lives, attending Come and See retreats, and eventually taking the first steps of the formal application process to enter religious life. The journey of discernment has not been a straight road, but every winding step has led closer to him. Now, I know that the goal isn’t to be the holiest person in the room; the goal is to become, by grace, the person God created me to be. The prize isn’t the religious habit — the prize is Jesus.
